Deployment 101

Good morning class! Or afternoon, depends on what part of the Earth you reside.. So, you are about to embark on a deployment huh? 1st off, hugs, 2nd off you will be FINE! It is scary to go through a deployment, whether its your 1st or 10th.

Somethings in life dont get easier, saying goodbye to your love is one of them. YOU do however learn what you are made of and find out all kinds of interesting things about yourself. Now, i'm not one to sugar coat things, so people either love my advice or want to punch me in the throat. I don't sugar coat things because I would be a HORRIBLE liar/mentor/friend/role model! Some things in life suck. There are things you need to know about deployments. First there is the RUMOR that there is a deployment pending-Relax, when its official you will be notified, 2nd, These Soldiers, Sailors, Airmen and Marines are in the military-Guess what that means? yep, they will be called upon to deploy.. So while its romantic to be married to one of these heros, the reality is that you will go through a deployment.. Good news is MOST spouses are built from steel and learn really fast how much they can endure and even blossom from this. Once you DEFINATELY know a deployment is coming, have your cry, your fit, your whatever-THEN put on the big girl panties or big boy chonies and get moving on the many things you need to do BEFORE the military person leaves.

Some things you will need to do before is: POA-POWER OF ATTORNEY, these will allow you to get things done with finance, banking, housing, credit cards, etc.. You will need multiple ones, contact your banks and financial companies to see if they require their own specific one. The military does these for free for you, so GET IT DONE!

Next is make a budget. Why make a budget? Well because while you will be getting extra money(approx 525.00 more each month) you and your sponser will be living in 2 separate areas and both will need money. He/she will need to pay for internet, phone cards, anything extra that he/she will require. Most soldiers use their eagle cash card, but guess where that money comes from? yes, your bank account. What we do is have a budget of how much Sal puts on his eagle cash card each pay period. For Sal, its 75.00(to be honest, out of the 150.00 he gets a month, id have to say he only uses about 40.00) YOU also need to be on a budget, because when that money comes in, you do enjoy and get used to it-Remember, it stops that moment he/she walks off that plane...Save as much as possible, you will want to have a nice trip when they come home, or buy some nice things for your house when he/she comes home.

Talk about your RR with your soldier, and include family and friends if that is what he/she desires, they love him/her too and are wishing nothing but positive things as well. If your soldier doesnt want family around, let them figure out how to let them know.

In regards to OPSEC, you CAN tell your parents, soldiers parents, etc where they are going, just let them know that it needs to be on the DL for a little bit. It puts their mind at ease, really it does. Make sure you send out his/her mailing address to his family and friends, I cannot stress how much soldiers enjoy hearing their name called at mail call. The more the better when it comes to love and support.
TO BE CONTINUED....

Anthony Giancarlo Urzi

So, 18 years ago I gave birth to our 2nd son. At the time we thought he would be the last of our spawn, so I savored each and every moment with him. He was born at 11:49am at Luke AFB in Phoenix Arizona, he weighed in at 8lbs and 11 ozs and was 20 inches long. Tony was born with a bitty bit of hair and was the yummiest baby ever. Sal was in Germany, so my stand in was my sister, Ronni. It was a quick labor and fairly easy. My sister kept reminding me I was having a baby, LOL.. Tony was a VERY particular kiddo.. He had OCD and tactile sensitivity, so his needs were WAY different than the others, LOL.. Some things we couldnt do with him was to put him in overalls(the straps were never even and exact enough) He has to wear socks with a red line across the toes and he had to line his feet up in them just right, his shoes had to be tied a certain way and GOD forbid if anyone touched ANYTHING he was eating, LOL.. Oy, he wore me out, but I didnt mind, we just thought he was a picky kiddo, LOL.. So, eventually he grew out of those things and became one of the FUNNIEST people I know... Im proud to call him my son and proud of him.. so here is my Dear Tony letter..Im trying to do this without tears..

Dear Tony,

WOW! Today you turn 18!! 18 means so many things. It means you are an "adult", you can make adult decisions, you can vote, you have to register with the Selective Service. I cant describe how much we love you. I love your funny sayings and love that you dont swear-that is a rarity in your age group. I love that you ALWAYS help homeless people and encourage others to do the same. I love that when you talk about playing in the NBA, that you also say you will always feed the homeless and help them. One of the greatest memories I have of you is when you and little Nic fist pumped a not so cool little freshman in front of your peers. You should have seen his face. He looked as though he were on cloud 9. And you did it out of kindness, not being a smart butt. I remember saying something to you about it and you replied with " We look after that kid, he's a good kid" You are always for the underdog and never exclude people. That will help you go far in life, I promise. Even if your room is gross and a pigstye and eventhough you go through gas in cars like water and EVEN when your grades arent exactly where id hope- I love you. I love that you are my son, I love that you are in our lives, I love you for being a great big brother to your little brothers and a wonderful little brother to your sisters. I love and admire your unconditional acceptance to EVERYONE. You are a great man, Anthony Giancarlo Urzi.. You will go far in life. Always give everything 100% and remember, when you are playing for the Phoenix Suns-I will be in those stands, screaming "Thats MY boy!" XOXOXOXOXOXOXOX

Should I stay or should I go?

Okay, this is a question I see ALL THE TIME from military spouses.. Should I stay put at our duty station or go home to family??? This is TRULY a personal decision that ONLY YOU can make. You have to make a list of pros and cons. Ill share mine with you and you can see why I decide to stay put:

PROS-(to stay put)
*Get timely information
*Don't get lost in the shuffle(A great frg will always make sure you are contacted)
*I get to know our Rear D and the people who will understand any issues
*Im around "like" people, who are in this with me
*Im in OUR home
*Me and our children are stable
*We can participate in activities just for deployed families.
*We can participate in all the fun redeployment activities
I could go on and on, but you get the gist...

I choose to stay put because going home FOR ME, makes me feel like a child all over again and I cant stand it. We can go visit our family whenever we want and then leave :) Dont feel guilty if you HAVE to go home, its scary being in a different place and not around anyone that you need. If you stay put, volunteer, meet a mentor and stay positive. Make goals during the deployment and follow them :)

Good luck to my sister and brother spouses who are about to embark on their deployments...

Im baaaack

Hi guys and dolls. Im trying to make my blog part of my daily routine again. I really miss blogging, but sometimes I just get busy or tired, LOL.. I also tend to get writers block and ill type something and then delete it.. So here we go.

Ill catch you all up a bit on the goings on in my world. Im still employed :) That is always a good thing. I work for our housing office and LOVE LOVE LOVE IT!!!! Ill be moving to a new position in a few weeks, so im looking forward to that-BUT nervous because its something I never thought of doing, but I have great coworkers that will guide me. Still happily married and still have 6 kids-haha. So enough of about that, lets get blogging...

Tonight id like to blog about a few things. Right now is Military Ball Season for MANY Units, MOS's, etc.. Here are Mary's do's and don'ts when prepping and attending a military ball:

*DO GO!

*DO dress with some class and maturity(ie, no boas, tiaras, )

*DO go representing your soldier

*DO be a tad nervous, it tends to insure some good manners

*DO take in every moment of it and enjoy the tradition

*DO take lots of pics

*DO meet new people, now is no time to be shy.

*DON'T act like a weiner

*DON'T dance like you are working a pole

*DON'T be embarrassing

*DON'T Drink and Drive

*DON'T wear Tiaras, feather boas, dresses that allow anyone to see your bikini wax

*DON'T act like your bothered to be there

*DON'T point and talk about others-wait until you get home

Some spouses will love the ball and others will bitch and moan about how horrible it is or was, or how bad the food was, or how its wrong that their soldier was required to go-BLAH BLAH BLAH! If it is your first ball, you will get to witness some fun traditions that have been part of the Army life for YEARS, you will also witness traditions that will bring tears to your eyes and make you stop and think. I wont tell you what those are, but you will really shed a tear, I can assure you. Its fun to get dressed up and hang out with your soldier and other people in this life we live. You will hear speeches-some boring, some great. You will eat some iffy food and some great cuisine, its all what you make of it-With this said, enjoy it. There are MANY spouses who would LOVE LOVE LOVE to be attending a ball with their soldier but can't because their love is deployed, wounded or paid the ultimate sacrifice. Help other spouses out if they cant afford a new gown, lend them one, or get together and do a dress exchange, help each other get ready and embrace this. We as spouses are mentors to each other, in both positive ways and negative ones, so choose wisely in how you behave. Bottom line is have a great time...

Peek a boo!

Yep, its me. You know, Mary Urzi... I know, Ive missed you too! So for the past weeks I started working full time and trying to figure out how to balance that. I was working in 1 section of the company and was then moved to another after a couple of weeks. The new position has more responsibility, so of course that makes me nervous, but I do love it. I love being around people. I really havnt made much time to blog, but I am now getting into a routine and hopefully will be blogging more :)

Happy Fathers Day

So, today is fathers day. I want to blog about the best dad-My sweet pea, Sal. Why is he the best dad you ask? Well because NOTHING is more important than his family. I can remember with each birth, how he held those babies so strong and proudly and the love in his eyes was blinding. Sal has a career that doesnt always allow him to be here for each milestone, but he is always there in spirit and NEVER forgets to call them to wish them goodluck on a test, game, prom, ANYTHING... Sal has to be a disciplinarian at times, but he does it always in a loving way. He has always put his needs and wants on the back burner for this family and im always in awe of that. He is an equal partner in this marriage and in parenting our children so I wanted to say thanks to him tonight in my blog, so here goes-

Dear Sal,

WOW, this is your 22nd fathers day!! There are 6 wonderful people who had you in their lives to love and be loved by. I have sooo many wonderful memories of you as a father. There are a couple times that REALLY stand out in showing what a wonderful father you are. 1, is when I was out of the country and Ashlee had to go to a ball and YOU handmade her corsage(in Germany they arent a typical thing to go out and purchase) You did it McGiver style and it makes me crack up when I think about it, but it turned out beautifully and Ashlee was soo proud to wear it, you also took her to our friends to get her makeup done and you took pics for me, so I could be part of it. The 2nd time was when I was out of the country and you took Cassidy to get her 1 year pictures done and you even did her hair with a cute little ponytail and made sure to matchy match her outfit and everything! Ive watched you hold a tiny hand of a baby that was holding you tight as they were learning to walk, watching you hug a son who had just witnessed his own son entering this world, and holding a hand of a "little girl" as she was walking down the aisle to marry the new man in her life. We have leaned on each other when the tough times of parenting, pushed us to our limits and leaned on each other while watching the wonderful moments. You have loved these 6 humans we were gifted and loved them unconditionally, through and through. I love hearing you read to our kids, with your serious monotone voice(especially funny when they want you to read Dr Seuss), So, Sal-thank you for being my partner in this journey and being the most wonderful dadANY child could be lucky to have.. You are a beautiful man, truly.... Love always...

1 day late,

YESTERDAY was our daughters 21st birthday, and I DO usually blog on the actual day, but it was so hectic yesterday, I didnt have a chance to sit and collect my thoughts. So here goes, little guuuurl!

Dearest Ashlee Marie,

The day you were born was a beautiful sunny day in the DC area and it was fathers day(Yes, I get dad the BEST gifts, right?) It was also the 1st birth daddy got to witness(he was in basic for the birth of Nicholas) We were sooo young and had NO idea what it was going to be like to have a 12 month old and a newborn, but we quickly figured it out, LOL...When Maj Strange handed you to me, I just bawled, dad bawled, but not you.. Oh no, you looked at us as if to say, " listen bitches, im the new sheriff in town and im going to run the show! You were partially right in most of that. We NEVER thought we would ever have a girl, so you were quite a surprise! You were sooo tiny and just perfect. So, we took you home to introduce you to your big brother and he really wasnt toooo sure about you. Everytime YOU cried, he quivered his lip and cried too-awww.. It has been an adventure raising you, somedays I wanted to hug you because I just adored you, other days I wanted to hug you so hard you would pass out until you were 29! LOL.. You have become such a wonderful woman, daughter, sister, wife. Daddy and I are just in awe when we look at you. So beautiful inside and out and we adore your determined mind. Im proud of you for all you have done and look forward to see all that you will do. Its amazing to see you as a mother now and what a good job you and Blake are doing to raise her and show her the love and patience that kids deserve. We love you,

Hugs and kisses,

Mamma and daddy!